2024 Is the Year of the Cougar-Com: 'The Sex Isn't What's Most Taboo' (Exclusive)

Mar. 15, 2025

The Idea of You; A Family Affair; Lonely Planet.Photo:Tina Rowden/Netflix; Alisha Wetherill/Prime; Hilary Bronwyn Gayle/Netflix

Tina Rowden/Netflix; Alisha Wetherill/Prime; Hilary Bronwyn Gayle/Netflix

I’m calling it. As far as rom-coms go, 2024’s the year of the cougar.

Anne Hathawayfalls in love with a pop star inThe Idea of You.Laura Dernsteals another gal’s beau-slash-finance bro inLonely Planet.Nicole Kidmanhappily trips over a himbo of a Hollywood star inA Family Affair. Time and again this year we’ve had the pleasure of watching an older woman nab a younger man.

My point is, when it comes to an older gal/younger guy flick really hitting, it’s been a while. In 2024 we had at least three try.

The Idea of YouActuallySucceeds

Anne Hathaway as ‘Solène’ and Nicholas Galitzine as ‘Hayes Campbell’ star in ‘The Idea of You’.Alisha Wetherill/Prime

Alisha Wetherill/Prime

At any rate,The Idea of Youis a quality romance, the best of the lot. Hathaway and Galitzine deliver performances with pathos, and their connection’s as palpable as static.

A Family AffairStumbles

Nicole Kidman as Brooke Harwood and Zac Efron as Chris Cole in ‘A Family Affair’.Tina Rowden/Netflix

Tina Rowden/Netflix

BothA Family AffairandLonely Planetlean more into the “com” side of things, which would work better if they were funnier. In the first, Brooke Harwood (Nicole Kidman) is a widow whose twenty-something daughter Zara (Joey King) is having a tough time at work as the personal assistant to the A-list actor Chris Cole (Zac Efron). Zara’s living at home, presumably unable to afford LA rent.

After one of their routine fights in which Zara protest-quits, Chris, ever contrite, comes to her house to get her back — their employer/employee dynamic is modeled on romantic tropes, including Jerry Maguire-esque overtures in which Chris admits that he can hardly breathe without his PA (this seems to be true). But now he instead finds Brooke home alone, and the two hit it off.

With the aid of some midday tequila, their sexual tension reaches its logical conclusion, and soon after that, translates into true romance. The couple’s biggest challenge comes down to the fact that Chris is a selfish prick. Zara vehemently opposes the relationship because she knows that all too well, having PA’ed her boss out of more than one sticky situation.

Personally, I found the mother-daughter drama tiresome and overplayed. Brooke’s a grown woman yet it takes most of the movie to assert her right to date whoever she wants. That said, the wrap is rather original — those vegetable sprayers they have at the supermarket play a prominent role. Besides, it’s secretly a Christmas movie, and who can hate a Christmas movie? In fact if they’d just held the release and marketed it that way, as a friend and I agreed, it probably would’ve done better.

Lonely PlanetStays Lonely

Laura Dern as Katherine Loewe and Liam Hemsworth as Owen Brophy in ‘Lonely Planet’.Hilary Bronwyn Gayle/Netflix

Hilary Bronwyn Gayle/Netflix

Katherine Loewe (Laura Dern) inLonely Planetis the only lady of the set whose identity doesn’t hinge on motherhood. She’s a celebrated author going through a divorce, set on finishing her book while on a writers’ residency in Morocco. Diana Silvers (Lily Kemp) is a young author thrilled to arrive at her first fancy gig, at a grand mosaicked palace with a pool. Her plus-one Owen Brophy(Liam Hemsworth) is sweet and supportive, but he isn’t much of a reader, and it quickly becomes clear that Diana gets off on pushing him around.

The negging stops working when Owen discovers that she’s slept with one of the other writers. They break up. Meanwhile, Owen’s been developing a heartfelt relationship with Katherine, the retreat’s guest of honor, who also happens to be Diana’s personal hero. Katherine’s here to work, but as soon as Owen’s free, she does allow herself the pleasure of a magical day or two together — and night or two, of course. Disaster hits and they’re pulled apart.

An awkward and rushed flash forward reunites the couple at the very end. It’s not satisfying. There’s something forced about Dern and Hemsworth. Sure, they’re both knockouts. But one plus one doesn’t always make a couple.

The Idea of You; A Family Affair; Lonely Planet.Tina Rowden/Netflix; Alisha Wetherill/Prime; Hilary Bronwyn Gayle/Netflix

These three movies have a lot in common. Each one features an artsy successful woman as its lead: Solène owns an art gallery in Silver Lake, Katherine is a well-respected novelist. Brooke is also — though insufficiently squared with her beachside property — a writer. Plus, all three women come to their young beaus via a daughter, or pseudo-daughter like Diana.

Having a MILF use her daughter to get to her man is a plot crutch. To say nothing of the fact that in every one of these movies, the guys need a minute to grow up, whether literally or emotionally, before we can have our happy ending. (Rom-mom,anyone?)

But then again, there’s something subversive about all this. A mature woman in need, these movies seem to claim, has no choice but to rob the cradle — men peak earlier. That’s just science. (Fresh-d*** flickmight be more apt.)

Still, the sex isn’t what’s most taboo about the cougar-com. The relationship is. So why the upsurge, and why now? The short answer is power, and the fact that women in America have a tiny bit more of it than they used to.

That bears out in each plot: Brooke ends up in bed with Chris before she takes him seriously. Katherine, on the other hand, spends her first encounter with the boy who becomes her man ignoring him: they’re stuck in a car together, and she’s trying to write. But it’s her openness to connection and her willingness to see the best in people — to embrace the whole human as she would a character’s complexities — that lets their love bloom.

Solène similarly first flirts with her boyband beloved almost despite herself, and in fact, after eye-rolling at her husband’s new relationship with a younger woman. (To be fair, his started as the affair that broke up their marriage.) Because these characters are artists, we can imagine them following their hearts over their minds. It helps the audience suspend disbelief.

But isn’t the very idea that we’ll have a hard time believing in these love stories — believing that a rich and pretty prince would actually choose to woo an attractive and powerful woman — just what these movies are fighting against? Whatever the problems with these flicks may be, it definitely isn’t a leap to imagine falling for Anne Hathaway, Nicole Kidman or Laura Dern. Each lead’s beauty and charm is easy and organic. None of these women is fishing when they haul in the catch.

Like most rom-coms, these three reflect the contradictions women face in today’s America. In the dawn of the girl boss, American women have in some ways never had more power than now. Yet gains in women’s bodily rights have been rolled back and the gender pay gap hasn’t budged much throughout the twenty-first century.

But on screen, at least, this trio provides models for the idea that women (or white women, at least?) can have it all: money, career, young love — in short, what many American men have enjoyed for a long time. Now if only that vision can be made a reality.

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Mariam Rahmani’s new book,Liquid: A Love Story, comes out March 11, 2025 and is now available for preorder, wherever books are sold.

source: people.com