Wedding Guest Doesn’t Want to Give Bride and Groom a Gift Because They Have to Pay for Travel to Destination Nuptials

Mar. 15, 2025

A table of wedding gifts (stock image).Photo:Getty/Tetra images RF

Getty/Tetra images RF

A wedding guest is wondering if it would be “rude” if they didn’t give the bride and groom a gift because they are already spending a lot of money to attend the couple’s “costly” destination wedding.

In addition, the guest noted, the bride has asked her bridesmaids to pay for their own dresses, hair and makeup. With all the travel and wedding-related expenses, the guest is feeling financially pinched.

“I’m already stressed about how much this is going to cost,” they wrote, adding, “And to make things trickier, cash gifts are a tradition at weddings in her culture. I’m worried she’ll expect one, but after all these expenses, I’m not sure I can manage it.”

A beach wedding setup (stock image).ozgurcankaya/Getty

ozgurcankaya/Getty

“Has anyone else been in a similar situation?” they asked.

Another wrote: “I agree. I actually think it to be tacky and inconsiderate of the bride to expect her wedding party to finance and take time off for two trips. If it’s a destination wedding, she doesn’t need to have a destination bachelorette party as well.”

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Yet another person told the guest to simply give a card with “a heartfelt note and call it a day.”

A bride walking down the aisle (stock image).Neustockimages/Getty

Neustockimages/Getty

Others assured the guest that it wouldn’t be rude to not give the newlyweds a gift.

“We’re not all made of cash,” one commenter wrote, sharing a similar personal experience. “I had to fly to my best friend’s wedding when I was in graduate school and I hosted a shower for her two days before because no one else volunteered to. All this to say that between the flight, food for the shower, bridesmaid dress, etc, I was BROKE. Her wedding present was my presence.”

Another person pointed out that the bride is “expecting a lot” from her friends and urged the guest to have an honest conversation with her about their concerns about the cost of everything. “If the bride doesn’t understand,” the commenter wrote, “you can also graciously step down [as bridesmaid].”

source: people.com